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class="info"> <span id="5vajrimf" class="time">時(shí)間：2020-08-20 12:46:28 </span> <span id="5vajrimf" class="sm_after_time"></span> <span id="5vajrimf" class="source"><a target="_blank" href="http://m.1-jiu.com/renshengganwu/" title="人生感悟">人生感悟</a></span> <span id="5vajrimf" class="source"><a target="_blank" href="http://m.1-jiu.com/usr/login.html" title="我要投稿">我要投稿</a></span> </div> <script type="text/javascript">s("content_top");</script> <div id="5vajrimf" class="content"> <p>煩惱來(lái)自不適當(dāng)?shù)钠谕娜松形?/p> <p>　　我們總會(huì)有各種各樣的煩惱。當(dāng)有了煩惱的時(shí)候，總會(huì)指責(zé)一些什么�！澳莻€(gè)人總和我對(duì)著干”、“那個(gè)孩子太不聽(tīng)話了”、“我對(duì)英語(yǔ)就是沒(méi)天分”、“我的運(yùn)氣總是好差，買(mǎi)的股票總是跌，而一賣就漲”等等。</p><p style="text-align: center;"><img loading="lazy" src="https://p.9136.com/00/l/b8d0cef202_6136d9e203c0d.jpg" alt="煩惱來(lái)自不適當(dāng)?shù)钠谕娜松形?/></p><p>　　事實(shí)上，我們的很多煩惱并非來(lái)自于外界，而是來(lái)自于自己不適當(dāng)?shù)钠谕Ｒ驗(yàn)椴辉敢饣蛘邲](méi)有勇氣面對(duì)這種責(zé)任，所以才從外界尋找指責(zé)的對(duì)象。實(shí)際這種指責(zé)除了推諉自己的責(zé)任以外，于事無(wú)補(bǔ)。只有檢查自身，找到問(wèn)題的根源，問(wèn)題才能真正得到解決。</p><p>　　如果煩惱來(lái)自于不適當(dāng)?shù)腵期望，那么我們應(yīng)當(dāng)學(xué)會(huì)降低自己的期望，那樣生活會(huì)有更多驚喜。</p><p>　　我們總是會(huì)有各種各樣的期望，有的時(shí)候你甚至沒(méi)有意識(shí)到這種期望的存在�！拔覀兘裢砣ツ衬筹埖瓿燥埌伞�，當(dāng)你說(shuō)這話的時(shí)候，其實(shí)你已經(jīng)想到了那家飯店的環(huán)境氛圍，你喜歡吃的菜，以及它的價(jià)格。這一切都在你潛意識(shí)里如此迅速的發(fā)生，以至于你沒(méi)有仔細(xì)地意識(shí)到，而如果你到了那家飯店發(fā)現(xiàn)于你預(yù)期有較大差別。你就會(huì)感覺(jué)很生氣或是失落。</p><p>　　同樣，這種事情經(jīng)常會(huì)發(fā)生在生活中，在跟人相處的時(shí)候，容易產(chǎn)生不適當(dāng)?shù)钠谕�，很多人都非常期望：別人應(yīng)該如何。不過(guò)，讓另外一個(gè)人完全去適應(yīng)你的方式幾乎不可能。如果，覺(jué)得對(duì)方?jīng)]有按照自己的方式，就氣憤，而橫加指責(zé)的話。我想那可能真是自尋煩惱。</p><p>　　寬容地對(duì)待別人，盡量揚(yáng)長(zhǎng)避短。如果他真的有問(wèn)題，而且無(wú)法避免的話，你要考慮他是否適合當(dāng)前的位置，或者有足夠耐心去幫他改正。同樣對(duì)待自己的孩子，會(huì)有更多的期望，也更容易犯拔苗助長(zhǎng)的錯(cuò)誤。</p><p>　　所以，跟別人相處時(shí)，發(fā)覺(jué)合作上有問(wèn)題是正常的，需要雙方共同努力去解決。如果對(duì)方有問(wèn)題，也盡量回避他的問(wèn)題，而不要急于糾正對(duì)方，要知道那不是一件容易的事。</p><p>　　同樣的問(wèn)題也會(huì)發(fā)生在我們身上。我們總是很愛(ài)自己，所以也會(huì)有更強(qiáng)烈的期望。當(dāng)我們想要什么而沒(méi)有得到，特別是別人已經(jīng)得到的時(shí)候，就會(huì)感到失落甚至痛苦。當(dāng)我們預(yù)期什么可以做到，而自己并沒(méi)有做到的時(shí)候，就會(huì)面臨挫折和沮喪。這時(shí)候，應(yīng)該反思的是我們的預(yù)期真的合理嗎？</p><p>　　有人特別期望成功，而他發(fā)現(xiàn)身邊根本沒(méi)有讓他實(shí)現(xiàn)成功的事情。于是感覺(jué)不受重視，懷才不遇。事實(shí)上，通常人們傾向于給自己較高的期望，而這種期望是本身又讓自己倍受壓力。這是為什么我們總是會(huì)感到壓力太大的原因。</p><p>　　我們總覺(jué)得太忙，太累，壓力太大�？墒�，如果我們?cè)敢饨档臀覀兊念A(yù)期，那么也許生活會(huì)更休閑，更輕松。</p><p>　　昨天，一個(gè)朋友跟我聊天時(shí)說(shuō)，他對(duì)未來(lái)困惑，希望尋找一個(gè)可以發(fā)財(cái)?shù)男袠I(yè)，然后投入其中努力工作。其實(shí)，這種想法我也曾有過(guò)。不過(guò)，現(xiàn)在我不這么想。</p><p>　　而有的時(shí)候這種壓力又是來(lái)自于攀比。雖然適當(dāng)?shù)膲毫梢宰屓诉M(jìn)步，但是過(guò)大的壓力也會(huì)讓人疲于奔命。所以，要做自己的主人，當(dāng)感到壓力太大時(shí)候，不妨降低一下自己的期望�？梢宰屪约嚎梢院煤眯菹⒁幌�，享受一下人生的樂(lè)趣。</p><p>　　我覺(jué)得發(fā)財(cái)這種東西有些可遇而不可求，而且沒(méi)有止境，你總是會(huì)覺(jué)得手上錢(qián)太少。為什么不先找一份自己喜歡的事情做起呢？做得好了，也許真的會(huì)發(fā)財(cái)，就算沒(méi)有發(fā)財(cái)起碼自己也過(guò)得快樂(lè)。</p><p>　　為一個(gè)發(fā)財(cái)?shù)钠谕疾ㄒ簧�，如果最后還沒(méi)有發(fā)財(cái)，那不是虧大啦。</p> 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