三年級英語笑話大全爆笑
幽默的人不僅僅會說笑話，還要懂得他人說的笑話，來測試一下你的幽默細胞的指數(shù)有多高吧!
三年級英語笑話大全爆笑一：籃球教練的心理學測試
The psychology instructor had just finished a lecture on mental health and was giving an oraltest.
一位剛剛做完一場有關心理健康講座的心理學指導老師，正在進行一個口頭測試。
Speaking specifically about manic depression, she asked, "How would you diagnose a patientwho walks back and forth screaming at the top of his lungs one minute, then sits in a chairweeping uncontrollably the next?"
測試主題定為躁狂抑郁癥，她問道：“你將怎樣診斷這樣的一個病人，他先是來回走著并大聲叫喊了一分鐘，然后坐在一張椅子上失控般地哭泣。”
A young man in the rear raised his hand and answered, "A basketball coach?"
一個坐在后面的年輕人舉手答道：“他是一個籃球教練?”
三年級英語笑話大全爆笑二：愛爾蘭人的運氣
Two Irish lovers are sitting on a bench, in a park. They are holding hands，but the lady is nervously twisting her hands.
一對愛爾蘭情侶坐在公園里的長椅上。他們手牽著手，但是那個女的一直緊張地擺弄她的雙手。
Mary: “Patrick. I have something to tell you.”
瑪麗:“帕特瑞克，我有些事想告訴你。”
Patrick: “Well，what’s on your mind? You know you can tell me everything.”
帕特瑞克:“好的，你在想什么?有什么事你盡管可以跟我說。”
Mary: “It’ s so terrible.”
瑪麗:“這件事簡直太難講出口了。”
Patrick: “You know you can trust me. What is it?”
帕克瑞克:“請你相信我，到底是什么事?”
Mary: “Well, it was a few years ago. Father lost his job, and no money in sight…”
瑪麗:“那是好幾年前的事了。我爸爸失業(yè)了，當時沒有錢。”
Patrick: “So, what is it?”
帕特瑞克:“那然后呢?”
Mary: “Oh. We were so desperate. For some time I had to turn… prostitute!”
瑪麗:“哦，當時我們簡直是絕望之極。所以有時候我不得不去做妓女!”
Patrick: “WHAT!”
帕特瑞克:“你說什么?”
Mary: “We needed the money so bad!”
瑪麗:“我們太需要錢了。”
Patrick: “There is no good reason for this! Endangering your very soul! How could you? YOU! Mary, this is more than I can stand!”
帕特瑞克:“不要找借口開脫了。出賣你的靈魂，你怎么能這么做呢? 你! 瑪麗，這我實在是接受不了。”
Mary: “Not you, Pat! No! I thought you'd understand. I thought your could still love me, even though I had been a whore.”
瑪麗:“不，帕特請不要這樣，我覺得你能理解我。我相信你依然愛我，哪怕我曾經(jīng)出賣過自己的身體。”
Patrick:“Oh! … You … Well, that's ok. For a moment I thought you said protestant’!”
帕特瑞克:“哦，你等會兒，那沒關系。剛才我還以為你是說你是當了新教徒呢。”
三年級英語笑話大全爆笑三：又一個引擎出了故障
A Boeing 747 was flying in the night sky of the Pacific Ocean. The captain got on the loud speaker:" Travellers, one of our engines was out of order , therefore we’ll arrive in Tokyo an hour late ."
一架波音747飛行在太平洋的夜空，喇叭里傳來機長的聲音：“旅客們，我們的一個引擎壞了，因此我們將晚到達東京一個小時。”
After a short while, the trumpet rang out again:" Everybody, the second one of our four engines went wrong, we will reach Tokyo late three hours as a result." At this time, the passengers started disturbance.
過了一會兒，喇叭再次響起：“諸位，我們四個引擎中又壞了一個引擎，為此我們將晚到三個小時。”這時，乘客開始騷動。
Someone said:" In case another engine is down again , we’ll be up here all night." Moreover, a chap got to shouting unendurably:" I do not choose to take your awful airplane any longer, let me get off quickly."
有人說：“萬一再壞一個，我們得呆在天上一整夜了。”還有已經(jīng)受不了的，大叫：“我再也不坐你們的'破飛機了，快讓我下去。”
三年級英語笑話大全爆笑四：Problem with gas放屁的問題
A little old lady goes to the doctor ... and says, "Doctor, I have this problem with gas, but it doesn't really bother me too much. They never smell and are always silent. As a matter of fact, I've farted at least 20 times since I've been here in your office. You didn't know I was farting because they don't smell and are silent." The doctor says, "I see. Here's a prescription. Take these pills 3 times a day for seven days and come back to see me next week." The next week the lady goes back. "Doctor," she says, "I don't know what the hell you gave me, but now my farts ... although still silent... stink terribly." The doctor says, "Good! Now that we've cleared up your sinuses, let's start working on your hearing."
有位小老太太去看醫(yī)生：“醫(yī)生，我有愛放屁的毛病。其實也不是大問題，只是我放屁不臭而且沒聲音。事實上，我在這里已經(jīng)放了20多個屁，但是你并不知道對吧，因為我的屁不臭，而且還沒聲音。”醫(yī)生說：“好的，我明白了。吃這個藥片，一天三次連續(xù)吃七天，下星期你再來。”一星期后老太太來了，“醫(yī)生，你到底給的我什么藥，現(xiàn)在我放屁還是沒聲音，但是怎么這么臭!”醫(yī)生說：“太好了!你的嗅覺正常了，現(xiàn)在開始治聽覺。”
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