一分鐘英語(yǔ)笑話故事
笑話來(lái)源于生活,卻又可以讓我們的生多些歡樂(lè)、開(kāi)心,現(xiàn)在,一起來(lái)開(kāi)心爆笑下。
一分鐘英語(yǔ)笑話故事【1】
One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk." "But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"
一天,父親與小兒子一道回家。這個(gè)孩子正處于那種對(duì)什么事都很感興趣的年齡,老是有提不完的問(wèn)題。他向父親發(fā)問(wèn)道:“爸爸,‘醉’字是什么意思?”“唔,孩子,”父親回答說(shuō),“你瞧那兒站著兩個(gè)警察。如果我把他們看成了四個(gè),那么我就算醉了。” “可是,爸爸, ”孩子說(shuō),“那兒只有一個(gè)警察呀!”
一分鐘英語(yǔ)笑話故事【2】
who want to go to heaven
The preacher was vexed because a certain member of his congregation always fell asleep during the sermon.
As the man was snoring in the front row one Sunday, the preacher determined he would teach him not to sleep during the sermon. So, in a whisper, he asked the congregation. "All who want to go to heaven, please rise." Everyone got up except the snorer. After whispering "Be seated", the minister shouted at the top of his voiced, "All those who want to be with the devil, please rise."
Awaking with a start , the sleepy-head jumped to his feet and saw the preacher standing tall and angry in the pulpit , "Well, sir," he said, "I don't know what we're voting on, but it looks like you and me are the only ones for it."
牧師非常生氣,因?yàn)榭傆幸粋(gè)人在他說(shuō)教時(shí)打瞌睡。
一個(gè)星期天,正當(dāng)坐在前排的那個(gè)人又在瞌睡時(shí),牧師決定要好好教育他一下,讓他不要再在布道時(shí)睡覺(jué)。于是他低聲對(duì)信徒們說(shuō):“想去天堂的人,都請(qǐng)站起來(lái)吧。”所有的人都站了起來(lái)——當(dāng)然,除了那個(gè)打瞌睡的人。在低聲說(shuō)過(guò)請(qǐng)坐后,牧師高聲喊道:“想去下地獄的人請(qǐng)站起來(lái)!”
打瞌睡的人被這突然的喊叫聲驚醒了,他站了起來(lái)?吹侥翈煾哒驹诮虊,正生氣的看著他。這個(gè)人說(shuō)道:“噢,先生,我不知道我們?cè)谶x什么,但看上去只有你和我是候選人。”
一分鐘英語(yǔ)笑話故事【3】
An Old Couple's Quarrel
A couple of codgers got into a quarrel and came before the local magistrate. The loser, turning to his opponent in a combative frame of mind, cried: "I'll law you to the Circuit Court."
"I'm willing," said the other.
"I'll law you to the Supreme Court."
"I'll be there."
"And I'll law the hell!"
"My attorney will be there," was the calm reply.
老夫妻吵架
一對(duì)性情乖僻的老夫妻發(fā)生了爭(zhēng)吵,一直鬧到地方法官那里。敗訴的一方以一種臨戰(zhàn)的姿態(tài)沖著對(duì)方嚷道:“我要到巡回法庭去告你。”
“愿意奉陪。”另一個(gè)說(shuō)。
“我要到最高法院去告你。”
“我也陪你。”
“我還要到地獄去告你。”
“我的`代理人會(huì)奉陪的。”對(duì)方平靜的說(shuō)。
一分鐘英語(yǔ)笑話故事【4】
A gentleman was invited for dinner. When he hurried there and sat down, he was happy to see a roast pig in front of his seat:"Not bad, I am next to the pig." But then he noticed the angry fat lady sitting next to him. He faked a smile and added: "Oh I am sorry, I meant the roasted one on the table."
一位先生去赴宴遲到了,匆忙入座后,發(fā)現(xiàn)自己的座位正對(duì)著乳豬,于是大為高興的說(shuō):“還不錯(cuò),我坐在乳豬的旁邊。”這時(shí)才發(fā)現(xiàn)身旁的一位胖女士正怒目相視,他忙陪笑改口到:“對(duì)不起,我說(shuō)的是那只烤好的。”
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