三篇英語笑話故事
一、The Use of a Handsaw 手鋸的使用
At the mall, my wife and I picked up some hardware items, including a handsaw. We were heading back to the car when we passed a steakhouse.
Let's try it. " my wife suggested. Although I felt a little foolish carrying the saw, I followed her inside.
Scanning the menu, my wife told the waitress, " I' 11 have chopped sirloin, please.
The waitress turned to me, eyed my saw and commented, "And I see that. you, sir, have come for our T-bone special.
在集市上，我和妻子買了一些五金用品，包括一個手鋸。我們返回汽車時剛好路過一家牛排店。 “我們嘗嘗吧，”我妻子建議說。盡管我覺得拿著鋸有點傻乎乎的，但還是隨她走了進去。 我妻子掃視了一下菜單對女招待說：“請給我來一份炒牛腰片。” 女招待轉向我，看了看我的鋸，說道：“我能看出，先生，你是來吃我們的T形骨特色菜的。”
二、The Name of a Poet 詩人的名字
Our teacher was telling us about a new system of memory training being used in some schools today. It works like this, she said. Suppose you wanted tore member the name of a poetRobert Burns, for instance. She told us to think of him as Bobby Burns. Now get in your head a picture of a London policeman, a bobby in flames. See? Bobby Burns! I see what you mean, said the class know it all. But how can you tell that it's Not Robert Browning?
我們的老師正在給我們介紹現在某些學校使用的一種新的記憶訓練系統。這個系統是這樣的，她說，假定你要記住一個詩人的名字，例如，要記住羅伯特·彭斯的名字。她告訴我們把他當作博比·彭斯，讓你的腦海里閃現出一個倫敦警察的形象，燃燒著的警察。明白嗎?警察燃燒! 我明白你的`意思，班上的萬事通說，但是你怎么能說那就不是羅伯特·布朗寧呢?
三、a neuropathy 一個神經病
Have a neuropathy, I do not know where to get a handful of pistols, he is gone in a little black alley. When suddenly a young man, neuropathy apart from anything else its guns on the ground by pointing to his head. Asked one plus a few zero. Terrified young people, thought for a long time. Answer, equals two. Neuropathy of the killing he did not hesitate. And then get pulled in his arms, said a cold, you know too much ...
有一個神經病，不知道從哪里弄來了一把手槍，他走在一條小黑胡同里。突然遇上一個年輕人，神經病二話不說將其按在地上用槍指著他的頭。問道，一加一得幾。年輕人嚇壞了，沉思了很久�；卮穑扔诙�。神經病毫不猶豫的打死了他。然后把搶拽在懷里，冰冷的說了一句，你知道的太多了…
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