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      1. 最新英語笑話幽默網文

        時間:2024-11-23 02:44:20 英語笑話 我要投稿
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        最新英語笑話幽默網文

          Psychiatrist

        最新英語笑話幽默網文

          Jerry went to a psychiatrist.

          "Doc," he said, "I've got trouble.

          Every time I get into bed,

          I think there's somebody under it.

          I'm going crazy!"

          Just put yourself in my hands for one year,"

          said the shrink.

          "Come to me three times a week,

          and I'll cure your fears.

          " How much do you charge?"

          A hundred dollars per visit.

          " I'll sleep on it," said Jerry.

          Six months later the doctor met Jerry on the street.

          "Why didn't you ever come to see me again?"

          asked the psychiatrist.

          For a hundred bucks a visit?

          The bartender cured me for $10."

          "Is that so!

          How?

          " He told me to cut the legs off the bed!"

          Ain't nobody under there now!!!

          杰瑞去看精神病醫生。“醫生,我有些不對勁。每次睡覺的時候,我都感覺有人在床下。我要瘋了!”

          “給我一年時間,”醫生說,“每周來三次,我會治好你。”

          “費用是多少呢?”

          “每次一百美元。”“我會認真考慮的。”杰瑞答道。

          六個月后醫生和杰瑞在街上相遇了,“為什么你再也沒來呢?”醫生問。

          “一次一百塊錢嗎?有個酒吧服務生收了十塊錢就把我治好了。”

          “真的?他怎么做到的?”

          An Entrance Examination

          入學考試

          In an entrance examination of a conservatory of music,the teacher asked one of the boys,"What is the most important physiological quality of a musician”

          在一次音樂學院的入學考試中,老師問一位應試的小伙子:“音樂家最重要的生理素質是什么?”

          "To be deaf,”replied the boy.

          “耳聾。”小伙子回答說。

          "Nonsense”said the teacher angrily

          “胡說!”老師憤怒地說。

          "Why, sirs Don't you know that the most famous musician Beethoven was deaf?”the boy asked in reply disdainfully.

          “怎么了,先生!您難道連鼎鼎大名的音樂家貝多芬是個聾子都不知道嗎?”小伙子輕蔑地反問道。

          Visiting A Chicken Farm

          參觀養雞場

          One day,a teacher took his pupils to a chicken farm to pay a visit. When they came near the incubator,a chick just got out of it’s eggshell.

          老師帶學生到養雞場參觀,當他們走近孵化器時,剛好一只小雞破殼而出。

          "It's wonderful to see a little thing come out from the eggshell,isn't it's it?”the teacher said.

          “看見一個小生命從蛋殼里出來,很奇妙,是不是?”老師說。

          "Yes,sir,"said one of the boys,“But it would be more wonderful if we knew that how a chick gets into its eggshell beforehand.”

          “是的,老師,”一個男學生說,“可是,如果我們知道它是怎樣事先鉆進蛋殼里的那就更奇妙了。”

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