英語笑話集中營

時間：2020-10-14 19:53:53 英語笑話我要投稿

英語笑話集中營2015

　　一場特殊的足球比賽

英語笑話集中營2015

　　Mike was late for school. He said to his teacher, Mr. Black, "Excuse me for my coming late, sir. I watched a football match in my dream."

　　"Why did it make you late?" inquired the teacher.

　　"Because neither team could win the game, so it lasted a long time." replied Mike.

　　麥克上學(xué)遲到了。他對布萊克老師說：“對不起，老師，今天早上我遲到了。因為我在夢里觀看了一場球賽。”

　　“為什么它會讓你遲到呢?”老師問道。

　　“因為這兩個隊都沒有能力獲勝，所以就持續(xù)的時間長了。”麥克回答說。

　　Reason of Punishment 懲罰的原因

　　One day a little girl came home from school, and said to her mother, Mommy, today in school I was punished for something that I didn't do.

　　The mother exclaimed, But that's terrible! I'm going to have a talk with your teacher about this! By the way, what was it that you didn't do?

　　The little girl replied, My homework.

　　一天，小女孩從學(xué)�；氐郊依铮瑢寢屨f：媽媽，今天在學(xué)校里我因為一件我沒有做的事情而受到懲罰。

　　媽媽激動地說：那真是太可怕了!我要跟你的'老師好好談一談，對了，你沒有做過的那件事是什么?

　　小女孩回答說：我的家庭作業(yè)。

　　Boy, Oh Boy 讓人無奈的孩子

　　When they're together, my five-year-old son and his cousin tend to cause mayhem. one Saturday, I put my foot down. "All right, you two," I said sternly. "No screaming , grabbing, whining, hitting, teasing, tattling, breaking toys, scratching or fighting."

　　As I turned to leave, I heard my son say, "C'mon, Steven, let's get dirty . "

　　我五歲的兒子和他的表弟在一起的時候，總要招來大亂。一個星期六，我開始抗議了。“好啦，你們兩個，”我嚴厲地說，“不許叫喊，不許亂拿，不許哭鬧，不許亂敲，不許取笑，不許扯淡，不許弄壞玩具，不許亂抓，不許打架。” 我剛轉(zhuǎn)身要走，就聽我兒子說：“來，斯蒂文，我們來把自己弄臟吧。”

　　A Present 凱特的禮物

　　Kate: Mom, do you know what I'm going to give you for your birthday?

　　Mom: No, Honey, what?

　　Kate: A nice teapot.

　　Mom: But I've got a nice teapot.

　　Kate: No, you haven't. I've just dropped it.

　　凱特：媽媽，你知道我要給你一件什么生日禮物嗎?

　　媽媽：不知道，寶貝，是什么呀?

　　凱特：一把漂亮的茶壺。

　　媽媽：可是我已經(jīng)有一把漂亮的茶壺了呀。

　　凱特：不，你沒有了。我剛剛把它給摔了。

　　Two Birds 兩只鳥

　　Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?

　　Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.

　　Teacher: Please tell us.

　　Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.

　　老師：這兒有兩只鳥，一只是麻雀。誰能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀嗎?

　　學(xué)生：我指不出，但我知道答案。

　　老師：請說說看。

　　學(xué)生：燕子旁邊的就是麻雀，麻雀旁邊的就是燕子。

　　這有多嬌生慣養(yǎng)啊

　　The six-year-old John was terribly spoiled(被寵壞的) . His father knew it, but his grandma doted on him. He hardly left her side. And when he wanted anything, he either cried or threw a temper tantrum(亂發(fā)脾氣) . Then came his first day of school, his first day away from his grandmother's loving arms.

　　When he came home from school his grandma met him at the door.

　　Was school all right? she asked, Did you get along all right? did you cry?

　　Cry? John asked. No, I didn't cry, but the teacher did!

　　六歲的約翰嬌生慣養(yǎng)。他的父親知道這一點，可他的祖父母仍然寵著他。這孩子幾乎寸步不離他的祖母。他想要什么不是哭，就是鬧。他第一天上學(xué)才離開祖母的懷抱。

　　約翰放學(xué)了，他奶奶在門口接他并問道：學(xué)校怎么樣?你過的好嗎?哭了沒有?

　　哭?約翰問，不，我沒哭，可老師哭了。

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