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搞笑有趣的英語(yǔ)笑話
預(yù)算超標(biāo)的小偷 Caught stealing
A shoplifter(商店扒手) was caught red-handed trying to steal a watch from a jewelry store. "Listen," said the shoplifter, "I know you don't want any trouble either. What do you say I just buy the watch, and we forget about this?"
The manager agreed and wrote up the sales slip. The crook(騙子,壞蛋) looked at the slip and said, "This is a little more than I intended to spend."
一個(gè)小偷在一家珠寶店企圖偷走一只手表的時(shí)候被當(dāng)場(chǎng)擒獲。“聽著,”小偷說(shuō),“我知道你們也不想惹麻煩。我把這只表買下,然后我們就當(dāng)什么也沒(méi)發(fā)生,你看怎樣?”
經(jīng)理表示同意,然后列了一張售貨單。小偷看著單子說(shuō)道:“這比我最初的預(yù)算稍稍高了一點(diǎn),你們還有沒(méi)有便宜一點(diǎn)兒東西。"
提醒 Warning
Several weeks after our son began his freshman year at Alma College in Michigan, my husband and I decided to visit him. I was careful to call him a few days in advance to "warn" him that we would be coming. When we arrived at the dorm, however, I was taken aback by the disarray of his room. "Forgot we were coming, didn't you?" I teased.
"Are you kidding?" he replied, "Why else would I have bothered to clean?"
我們的兒子是密歇根州阿爾馬大學(xué)的新生,開學(xué)幾個(gè)星期之后,我和丈夫決定去看看他。我特意提前給他打電話,“提醒”他我們將光臨。但是當(dāng)我們來(lái)到宿舍時(shí),他的房間凌亂不堪,我非常吃驚。“忘了我們要來(lái),是吧?”我取笑他。
“開什么玩笑?”,他回答說(shuō),“要不我憑什么費(fèi)神打掃?”
錢和朋友 Money and friends
A: Which do you find more important, money or friends?
B: Friends, of course.
A: Why?
B: I can always borrow money from friends.
甲:你認(rèn)為錢和朋友哪一個(gè)更重要?
乙:當(dāng)然是朋友。
甲:為什么?
乙:我總可以從朋友那兒借到錢。
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