英語故事集
提醒
我們的兒子是密歇根州阿爾馬大學的新生，開學幾個星期之后，我和丈夫決定去看看他。我特意提前給他打電話，“提醒”他我們將光臨。但是當我們來到宿舍時，他的房間凌亂不堪，我非常吃驚。“忘了我們要來，是吧?”我取笑他。
“開什么玩笑?“，他回答說，“要不我憑什么費神打掃?”
Ground Rules
One of my favorite teachers at Southeast Missouri State University in Cape Girardeau was known of his droll sense of humor. Explaining his ground rules to one freshman class, he said, "Now I know my lectures can often be dry and boring, so I don‘t mind if you look at your watches during class. I do, however, object to your pounding them on the desk to make sure they‘re still running."
基本原則
位于吉拉多海角的密蘇里東南州立大學有一位我非常喜歡的老師，他奇特的幽默感很是出名。在對一個新生班級講解他的基本原則時，他說：“我知道我的講課可能經常會枯燥乏味，了無生趣，所以如果你們在上課時看表我并不介意。不過我堅決反對你們將表在課桌上猛敲看它們是不是還在走。”
英語寓言小故事
Making His Mark “刻舟求劍”
A man from the state of Chu was taking a boat across a river when he dropped his sword into the water carelessly. Immediately he made a mark on the side of the boat where the sword dropped, hoping to find it later. When the boat stopped moving, he went into the water to search for his sword at the place where he had marked the boat. As we know, the boat had moved but the sword had not. Isn’t this a very foolish way to look for a sword?
楚國有個人坐船渡江時，他不小心把自己的一把寶劍掉落江中。他馬上掏出一把小刀，在寶劍落水的船舷上刻上一個記號。船靠岸后，那楚人立即從船上刻記號的地方跳下水去撈取掉落的寶劍。他怎么找得到寶劍呢?船繼續行駛，而寶劍卻不會再移動。像他這樣去找劍，真是太愚蠢可笑了。
To Pull up the Seedlings to Help Them Grow “拔苗助長”
Once upon a time, there was an old farmer who planted a plot of rice. After he planted the seedlings, every day he went to the field to watch the seedlings grow. He saw the young shoots break through the soil and grow taller each day, but still, he thought they were growing too slowly. Eventually he got impatient with the young plants and suddenly he hit upon an idea that one by one, he pulled up the young plants by half an inch. The next early morning, the young man couldn’t wait to check his “achievement”, but he was heart-broken to see all the pulled-up young plants dying.
從前，有個農夫，種了稻苗(seedlings)后，便希望能早早收成。每天他到稻田時，都發覺那些稻苗長得非常慢。他等得很不耐煩。想了又想，他終于想到一個“最佳方法”，他將稻苗全都拔高了幾分。第二天，一早起身，他迫不及待地去稻田看他的“成果”。 哪知，卻看到所有的稻苗都枯萎了。
Plugging One’s Ears While Stealing a Bell “掩耳盜鈴”
Once upon a time, there was a man who wanted to steal his neighbor’s doorbell. However, he knew clearly that the bell would ring and catch the other people’s attention as long as he touched the bell. So he thought hard and suddenly hit on a clever “idea”. He plugged his ears with something, thinking that everything would go well when he stole the bell. Unfortunately to his disappointment, the bell still rang loudly and he was caught on the spot as a thief.
從前，有一個人想偷鄰居門上的鈴，但是他知道一碰到鈴，鈴就會響起來，被人發現。他想啊想，終于他想出一個“妙極”，他把自己的耳朵用東西塞起來，就聽不見鈴聲了。但是當他去偷鈴時，鈴聲仍舊響起來，他被別人當場抓住。
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