I love meeting new people, even if it makes me a little nervous. But one set of words that I hear at mixers and networking events makes me really want to run for the hills. You may have uttered these words. And I want to share some alternatives with you, so that you’ll make more connections, rather than having people dash off.
我喜歡認識新朋友,即便這會讓我感到有些緊張。但從交友活動中聽到的一些話讓我真想逃之夭夭。你也許會說出這些話。我希望和你分享一些別的說法,這樣你會交到更多的朋友而不是讓人們對你避之不及。
Last night, I attended a fun networking event in Berkeley, full of people who are on LinkedIn. The event was hosted by Ilene Koehler, who set us up in speed-dating fashion, to mix and mingle for five minutes per “couple,” and then move on. I noticed that three of the people I met immediately introduced themselves by saying something like this:
昨天晚上,我在伯克利參加了一個有趣的交友活動。很多人是LinkedIn社交網(wǎng)站的網(wǎng)友。 這次活動的主持人是Ilene Koehler。她主持我們進行速配約會,每“一對”交流五分鐘,然后換不同的對象。我發(fā)現(xiàn)我見到的人中有三個直接這樣介紹自己:
“Hi. I’m John Doe. And I’m unemployed.”
“嗨,我叫John Doe,我沒工作。”
Shoot, this isn’t an AA meeting. But those initial words left me feeling awkward and sorry for my fellow networkers. Somehow, I felt obligated, like I was supposed to help out. The energy between us felt heavy. So I actually told one of these networkers, “Hey, you shouldn’t say your unemployed. Say you’re between jobs. Or tell people that you’re looking for a new job in whatever field you’d enjoy.” He got the point immediately. He smiled. He felt better about himself.
暈,這不是一次AA制聚會。這樣的開場白讓我覺得窘迫,并為同來的人們感到抱歉。不知為什么,我覺得我必須幫助他們。我們兩人之間的氣氛變得很凝重。于是我告訴其中一位:“嘿,你不必說自己沒有工作。說你正在求職;蛘吒嬖V別人你正在尋找一份自己喜歡的工作。”他立刻明白,笑了笑,覺得輕松多了。
You see, saying “I’m unemployed” tells people what you’re not. And, in this case, it communicates “I’m not employed.” To me, saying “I’m unemployed” sounds a little bit like you don’t feel like you fit in with the world. Look, my friends, your self-worth is not determined by your job.
你看,說“沒有工作”是在告訴別人自己“不是什么”。 此時,它傳遞的是“我沒有工作”的含義。但是對我而言,它聽上去有點像是你覺得自己沒有融入這個世界。嗨,朋友們,你的自我價值不是由你的工作決定的。
I invite you to consider what really makes up your self-worth—like your caring heart, or your ability to stand tall in the face of adversity. But please know that you are not a social misfit just because some company has not decided to bring you on board. Or some organization decided to let you go. A company is not your family, believe it or not. So, if you don’t “belong” to a company, you’re still a living, breathing, talented human being.
請你想一想到底是什么構(gòu)成了你的自我價值——比如:關(guān)愛之心、面對逆境堅強不屈的精神。但是要知道,僅僅是某公司沒有錄用你或者當(dāng)某個企業(yè)讓你走人并不表明你是社會中的“另類”。公司不是你的家,信不信由你。所以,如果你不“屬于”一個公司,你還是一個活著的、呼吸著的、有才華的人。
不要說“我失業(yè)了”
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