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Negotiation Skills-Hard Approach Soft
A negotiation is an interactive communication process that may take place whenever we want something from someone else or another person wants something from us.
negotiation means the process of bargaining in order to arrive at an agreement or compromise on a matter of importance. it pertains to business as well as interpersonal communications. negotiation is usually considered as a compromise to settle an argument or issue to benefit ourselves as much as possible.
“hard approach” means in the negotiations we use some relatively intense language or our topic concerns some provoking things which may excite the other side. this is “hard bargaining” in which you give nothing and demand everything. you apply pressure to get your way. this approach is important when you absolutely must win, even if other persons will lose. the approach works well when you face weak or confused negotiators. it is less appropriate when a long-term relationship has to be maintained, or when your opponents are well prepared. using this hard approach usually aims at winning the initiative in the negotiations or by exciting the other side to let them make the quick response, but if we use hard approach in an unsuitable situation, it may trigger the conflict between the two sides. and what is worse,the misusage of approach may destroy the negotiation plan.
in the negotiation，usually one occupies the superior position by their absolute advantages, and get the initiative. first, the adequate professional knowledge is necessary。for example, when the other side points out that the price is too high, they may take the advantage of jargons or the professional knowledge about the quality, technique, cost of purchasing, the wastage efficiency, for the purpose of occupying the superior position. second, one must firmly control of the whole situation.
“soft approach” means we use the soft and modest words to inquire of the other side or to make concessions for alleviating the intense atmosphere in the process of negotiating. this is also called the “soft bargaining” approach. it minimizes the degree of conflict by generating trust and kindness. using the soft approach, we can break the iceberg between the negotiators, as well as let the opponent to be slack which just like making a feint to the east and attacking in the west. you are looking for common ground and joint interests, and you want everyone to benefit. you compromise, and you expect other people to do the same. the approach is at its best when other individuals similarly cooperate. although it is a good strategy, it also has its defect. it may force us into the passive state or even fall into a trap designed by the opponent. and it does not work when others regard your “soft” approach as a weakness that they can exploit.
soft approach is widely used in the inquiring with the host. taking advantage of his own predominance in negotiation, the host can use this strategy efficiently. for instance4, if the host want to get the other side's deadline, they can go to great lengths to show their hospitality. a competent negotiator knows what kind of image he or she projects. good negotiators also recognize and respond to the negotiating styles on the opposite side of an argument. for example, is your conflict with someone who generally needs social approval, and who therefore will favor cooperative negotiation? or is your conflict with an aggressive personality who enjoys defeating an opponent? other styles include negotiators who are intuitive, naive, deceptive, hostile, sarcastic, and so on. in each situation, you try to understand your negotiating personality in relation to others. this increases the prospects for your negotiation to succeed. to ease the stress of negotiating and improve the chances for a successful result, establish rapport with your opponent, and build on that foundation. this is especially important in cases where the parties will have a long-term relationship after closure.
negotiation is a problem-solving exercise to create options that benefit everyone. a successful negotiator should use both of these two methods appropriately. before you decide to negotiate, it is a good idea to prepare. what is it exactly that you want to negotiate? set out your objective which is very useful. and we should try to first separate the people from the problem; then focus on interests, not positions and generate options for mutual gain; lastly use objective criteria to make decisions. according to different situation we should response properly and to the point. it is necessary to accurately identify each other's leaders and to take the initiative to attack. and at the same time, in some certain situation we also need to make concessions. when you make a concession, the other party will usually respond with one. indeed, he will feel compelled to do so. the flip side of this rule is that when you do someone a favor, they will feel indebted to you for it. there are five basic principles in negotiations: be hard on the problem and soft on the person; focus on needs, not positions; emphasise common ground; be inventive about options; make clear agreements. master negotiators are always on the look-out for an acceptable compromise, especially as the gap between the parties' narrows. making concessions triggers the law of reciprocity.
the experienced negotiators know how to make some compromise. they will use some chips that are not as important as others to exchange some other chips which they consider more important while the opponents may consider it inessential for achieving the win-win negotiation.
there are different styles of negotiation, depending on circumstances. neither of these approaches which include the hard approach and soft approach is usually much good for resolving disputes with people with whom you have an ongoing relationship: if one person plays hardball, then this disadvantages the other person – this may, quite fairly, lead to reprisal later. similarly, using tricks and manipulation during a negotiation can undermine trust and damage teamwork. while a manipulative person may not get caught out if negotiation is infrequent, this is not the case when people work together routinely. here, honesty and openness are almost always the best policies. to sum up, we should prepare well and use those strategies efficiently and properly.
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